Alcoholic emotions

No, I’m not a drunk.. nor am I drunk either. At least not at the moment. Though I have things that I’m about to say that are possibly influenced by my minimal intake of alcohol just a few moments ago.

So there’s this old friend who used to be kind of special to me. Nothing really followed after those sweet messages and awkward stares way back (like, waaay baack) and all along I thought I’ve forgotten such things existed. Until you see that person again and you just majestically fall silent and start acting like shit because he/she is around. You can’t stop staring at that face (or in my case, stealing glances because, well, I’m too cool to admit it.) Like… Holy moly, could these be actually new found love symptoms?!

Well.

I hate to burst your (and my) bubble, mofos, but NO, IT IS NOT. It can’t be. Yet I’m not dismissing the possibility that I might actually like this person. For one, I don’t think I’m capable of *~LoVe~* at the moment. You know: school, career, future, my utter disgust and distrust for people in general. Nope. For another, I refuse to believe that the feeling is as mutual as it used to be. We’re barely even friends. Hell, we haven’t even spoken more than a sentence to each other the entire time that we were together. But then I get reminded of all the memories we’ve shared ’cause you know, we used to be really good friends and it’s kinda sad. However, nothing really matters since that person does not seem even a bit interested anymore. I guess in a lot of occasions, time can really ruin tiny beautiful things in our lives.

Ugh. Time.

It’s just I can’t help but wonder about the most intriguing statement of them all – what if. But then again there’s really nothing more that I can do aside from babble about this here. x

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